In sports, they call it a "message".  It's the high, inside, heat that forces the batter off the plate. The blistering forecheck that makes the defense think twice about handling the puck along the boards. It's the barrage of late hits that rattle the quarterback into floating quick outs to a new #1 receiver, "sideline cameraman". And in fantasy, it's our flagship "Mustache Ride" trophy. It delivers your league a very specific message, with a booming voice and bourbon breath: "Go f*ck yourselves".

The Mustache Ride.  It's basically a boner that you're allowed to show people.

approx. dimensions 9.75" x 5" x 9"
approx. weight 5.2 lbs